Happy Holidays.

Hey everybody. I just want you to know that we have an AMAZING GOD. And I'm never thankful enough. I hope everyone had a wonderful christmas and is looking forward to the coming new year!

quiz practice.

i'm supposed to be at practice right now--scott is there, and the kids are getting ready for st. louis..so its kind of an important practice. but today at work, things were kinda stressful. im used to moving fast--thats what i learned casework was all about...but everyone at work is a little older, and used to moving much slower..which is amazing since they used to have 3 times the caseloads we have now. how did they do it? who knows. but its frustrating when there are lots of things going on, and everything moves slowly. sometimes maybe life moves too fast. there are so many things i could post about--but my husband brought me home donuts last night-and thats enough.

i listened to part of a david crowder interview today as part of the 20 days of world changers thingy...and he's just really cool. i love that the band still makes every effort to get home for sunday services at their home church-because its a priority. i feel like so many people aren't committed to their priorities anymore--and they get shoved aside when things get busy. like friendship. or writing a book. or taking time to retreat, or time for family. for example--i need to go to practice..because its a priority--beyond a committment. i love those students. they're funny, and amazing, and well...they brighten my week. but i just didnt want to go into practice with the frustration of my day. so now, im going to go. and hopefully they'll play some crowder on my way across town!

NYWC

well, im here at the national youth workers convention. its funny how some of the greatest friends i have i only see once a year. its so good to be among friends, and enjoying time with God. It's like camp--and going home depresses me. Glenn said he can't contract karen and me at the price we want..so i guess home is where we have to go-but not until tuesday. this week is so long..and so tiring, and in all of that, its energizing. its so cool to be a part of all of this. i love it.

we're in the general session right now, listening to the skit guys. jars of clay just got done playing, and soon it will be starfield. right now, im glad the store is in the general session. tonite, during the toby mac concert, i wont be so happy-but thats alright. i probably should go do the returns while the store is more empty. hope all is well with everyone!

thanks for all the get well wishes.

just kidding. i totally wasn't sick or anything. just wishing i was like ferris bueller. man, that guy had some fun. i suppose that there's a lot to enter, and actually owe it to you, my viewers to update more frequently or to add things of substance when i do get around to the occasional update. so lets see...

we're moved into the parents house, with walls and everything, and that seems to be going alright. im glad for my parents allowing us to be here for a few months. although they did tell me about a house for sale in chebanse, so perhaps they're ready to be rid of us already (probably more rid of the constant ins and outs at random times of the day).

I finally got a job...at Catholic Charities in kankakee. I actually got the call the day I posted last and was getting ready to mail in some stuff to LSSI, and was told by the guy at catholic that he wanted to interview me right away, in hopes of not having to interview anyone else if i was interested. so i just finally started late last week--after getting through the paperwork and whatnot. im going to be doing a program called FAMILY FIRST which works with families in crisis so that their children aren't placed in foster care. im only doing it until january (probably) at which time i will return to regular foster care. which is fine too. the environment is really really different that LSSI, but so far, i like it.

I made valeries dessert chips, and mom and i stayed up chatting until 1 am on friday night/saturday morning...so that was good times

im going to michigan this weekend with the K3 Hammers and it'll be the first time we get to wear our shirts...probably. so thats FUN.

I think thats the big news. Scott still needs lots of prayers to get a day job. that would make life fantastic.

and now, just for paul: *moviegoer tip of the day* When you walk into a theatre on a saturday night, and notice no other customers in the lobby, PLEASE do not make a funny joke about attendance. The employees are already worried that if business doesn't pick up, they won't have jobs, and your comments only hurt their feelings. Smile, order politely, go sit down. That works every time, and no one gets hurt.

oh YEAH...CARDINALS WIN!! CARDINALS WIN!! WORLD SERIES CHAMPS 2006!!

yay

so, i'm paying my bills...

So, I'm paying my bills and i totally freak out because I have two or three bills left and ZERO dollars. So we call the bank, and figure its time to get that money we left behind in rantoul...and it's WAY WAY more than I thought it was, so Praise Jesus...we have plenty of money to pay our bills and get some medium drinks at mcdonalds (its monopoly season people!)

In other news, Scott's workin full time at Rubys, and i'm workin at meadowview. It's temporary until we can find day jobs, but while its nice being on the same schedule, it isn't nice to have to take off days without pay...but we'll get by...i interviews at LSSI in Joliet today to work at their senior residence center as an activity coordinator--and it sounds like a cool job, so i hope i get it...but i am worried that i won't EVER see scott if i work 8-5 and he works 5-1. See the problem?? yeah. We're working on it. It's all gonna be alright.

In still other news, sometimes following Jesus is stupid. It's ok to say that because Jesus understands. Sometimes you have to do crazy things you wouldn't ever dream of doing-- just for Jesus. Yeah, its frustrating at times, but it's worth it--everyday.

The Youthworker convention is in ONE month. That's exciting. I hope zondervan didn't do anything crazy.

the second regular quiz of the season is this saturday...im excited. not as excited as last time, but way more prepared :) i even have 4 or 5 quizzers going..so thats cool too.

scott took back harvest moon. i had been playing it faithfully (like any good farm girl) and thats one of the reasons for the delay in posting. The other would be the dial-up and the crazy schedules.

moving day.

last week was the district leadership conference, so we got to hang out with steve and bill and some other cool people-including kent-which was awesome since he will be at a different NYWC this year than us. We also got to learn some things about quizzing, which is always good. and eat dinner with the other quiz directors from our region...which was really helpful.

then we went to st. louis-ish, to see rachel and joel and make preparations for scotts sisters wedding. that was more than interesting, but overall, a good time.

well folks. we're officially moving again tomorrow. still no jobs. but i work at the meadowview all weekend. so thats fun. we have lots of packing still to do. our hope is that we can get all the furniture and whatnot moved, and if we have to leave behind a few things, we can finish up the moving on thursday afternoon or whatever.

In other news: we had 19 teams at the quiz on saturday!! any of you who know anything about quizzing on our district knows what a big deal this is--we're super excited for this quiz year! Yay to Jesus :) personally--the K3 hammers (named during the quiz) were 4th, and grace was 3rd individually. we had a super good time. sunday was the afterglow and i got to hang out with caley and baby peyton. so that was fun times as well.

we've been babysitting julia the past few days, which has been fun, but definately slowed the packing process down. silly babies needing attention :)

well, its back to packin for me. Hope things are going well with everyone.

maryland.

so, thats where many of you hope we might be moving.

nope. we're moving to chebanse, and staying with my family for a bit. our hope is to buy a house sometime in the near future (within 6-8 months) and perhaps have a small one.

of course, we would love for everyone to pray super hard. We still don't have jobs.
Now, we can get really low paying jobs to get by with-we've always got Ruby's and the Theatre... but not if we want to get a house, or even rent something.

so yeah. prayer is appreciated. Hope everyone is having a good labor day weekend.

i love my husband.

the august recap...

FOR THE RECORD: I have tried to post this like 7 times...and every time, it moves my pictures back to the left, even though I've changed it, and the preview shows me the right way. So sorry my post is ugly. I guess you can't always be pretty!

So, I've got no real "end of the month events--
I also have no pictures of Evan's graduation party
But, Quizmania was middle of the month, and it was good fun

And a few weeks before that
we celebrated our 7th anniversary
in St. Louis. Scott's parent's took us to lunch and then we went and
saw the Chihuly glass exhibit at the Botanical Garden

And while we were in St. Louis for our weekend long celebration,
we hung out with Evan and Liz (again no pictures)
and hung out at the city museum
which is like a giant jungle gym/playground


We also went to a Cardinals game because
Scott had gotten tickets for his birthday
to be redeemed on this anniversary trip.

Overall, it looks like it was a pretty good month.
Coming in September: the move, our first district quiz as directors,
District Leadership conference with Bill and Steve,
Erica's wedding, and maybe some other fun stuff.

we're moving.

of course, this is no suprise. when aren't we moving? anyway-i think we're actually going to get to move on Sept 9. (if we get the basement finished, and our crap packed).

Quizmania went pretty well. I'm excited to see how the year is going to turn out. there's a few pictures on jeremy's site, and all of the pictures are up at the ccdquiz gallery (so visit the website and see em!)

two more weeks at Lutheran. Yay. im sad to be leaving, but since my supervisor drives me up the wall, i can do the same job closer to my family. and thats better for everyone.

oh, we still don't have jobs. we're working on it though.

i think thats about it in the news department.

of course.

well, quizmania is tomorrow. so of course i am sick. I am currently medicated. it's NICE.

Rest for the weary

The following is an article written by the late Mike Yaconelli, co-founder of Youth Specialties. It's how It helps when I get tired, and I hope it helps you.

My life at present seems like an impenetrable jungle of responsibilities, a jagged briar patch of relationships, a tangled web of obligations. It feels like I am lost in the darkness of everyone else’s needs, silently pursued by a growing crowd of strangers who crave one more piece of me. Even in the dark, I can feel the penetrating stare of those who don’t know me. Feelings of loss and loneliness dog my steps, and I begin to sag under the weight of it all. Exhausted, weak, confused, I remember the words of Tilden Edwards:

The more that rushes through our minds, the more complicated and anxious life seems. Maybe TV will help settle us down—or the newspaper—or some work—or sex—or a big snack. Less seems to gnaw at us then. Life stays put for a moment. We feel in control again—we’re "doing" something—anything.

The after-effect of the doing leaves us more anxious, but more drugged. We’ve exchanged a gnawing anxiety for a dulled sensibility. Maybe, at least, we can sleep now. We do, on the surface. But not below. Our dreams are troubled. Fragments of life whir round and round without a center. We wake tired, and struggle out for another round.

You and I share such an "underlife." It usually is bearable; it even seems "normal," sometimes out of sheer habit. Sometimes it is even fun. But it is not fulfilling. We are grown for more than that. When this becomes most clear, when the whole daily round feels most wearisome, we hear ourselves crying out...How long will I , must I, tromp through this dense jungle half crazed and blind before the clearing appears?

"Half crazed and blind?" Wait a minute...that sounds like me! And here is the most frightening part—no one knows I’m half crazed and blind! I look normal! The reality is that I not only look normal, I look better than normal. After all, I am a minister, I do talk about God a lot, I appear to everyone around me to be a good person. So I not only look normal, I look better than normal.

But I’m not. I am "tromping" through the years of my life, half crazed and blind, looking for a clearing, longing for a clearing, desperate for a place where life can stay put for a moment.

Apparently (and this should come as no surprise), I have to be half crazed and blind before I am willing to do anything about that which makes my life half crazed and blind. Apparently, I have to experience density before I look for a clearing. I am beginning to understand that life is not so much a search for answers, as it is a search for clearings. Clearings are the required stopping places in our lives when our lives get to be too much.

A clearing is a place of shelter, peace, rest, safety, quiet, and healing. It is a place where you get your bearings, regroup, inspect the damage, fill out the estimate and make the repairs. It is the place where the mid-course corrections are made—where you can change course, even, or start over. A clearing is a place where you can see what you couldn’t see and hear what you couldn’t hear.

Clearings are not optional. They are longings in disguise. They are the required rest stops of life when our exhausted souls run out of steam. A clearing is the only place left to go when the madness of our lives has left our souls dying, hungering, gasping for oxygen and nourishment. If we don’t seek the clearings, then we will be brought to them forcibly in the form of a heart attack, illness, breakdown, anxiety attack, depression and/or loneliness. I am beginning to believe that life is not a search for jungleless existence, but rather a search for a few clearings in the midst of the jungle. Life is not triumph over the jungle, but rather submission to reality that clearings are integral to life in the jungle.

Life requires not only the recognition of the need for clearings, but the humility to look for guides to get us there. Those guides have different names (wife, husband, minister, child, friend, mystic, books, mentor, counselor, dad, mom).

The Christian life is a "tromp." It is a majestic tromp, but a tromp, nonetheless. The Holy Spirit doesn’t bring us to a limousine, it brings us to a clearing.

I didn’t find my first clearing until I was approaching 50, and now, three years later, I have sought out my next clearing. I have sought it out because I had no choice: my anxiety level was dangerously high, my relationships were clearly in jeopardy, and wherever I looked in the aftermath of my life, someone was getting damaged. My friends, my wife, and my children could see what I couldn’t see, and they hemmed me in with the truth so I had no alternative but to desperately find a clearing.

My clearing this time was in the form of a counselor who spent three days taking me through the jungle of my life. (My counselor, by the way, made it very clear that I cannot preach about my experience nor write about it. I have become quite good at writing about clearings rather then experiencing them). I can tell you that my clearing was not all that fun. It was painful exhilaration, though—and in time, I will be ready to cautiously move into the jungle once again.

For now, however, I’m going to hang around the clearing for awhile—maybe even dance around it—just so I can savor what it is like to experience sight and sanity once again.

--Mike Yaconelli

the best thing i read all day.

So last week...scott got this book-PLAN B FURTHER THOUGHTS ON FAITH and i thought it sounded alright--but more like i have nothing else to read on sunday afternoon so why not? But today, i get up and go to leave for work--and i think i should take that book with me (as i was going to be sitting at mcdonalds supervising visitation for three hours). I had another book already in the car--but something (probably Jesus) suggested this book was to be my reading for the day.

The story is really long, and so I'm not going to post it here--but you should get the book, the author is Anne Lamott (and its on the 3 for 2 table at borders!) and read the story red cords. It really helped me to get this insight into how we are connected, anointed and loved by a crazy wonderful God. It gave me hope, and peace. It also gave me strength and courage. It really affected me.

I hate being jealous. Ask my husband, i'm jealous a lot. whether its because some of our friends have babies, or homes or whatever--i get jealous. Now-we're really happy and we've chosen to live the lives we're living. We opted for doing tons of volunteer work (and missing vacation opportunities to maryland or disney) to do these things--camp, quizzing, youth work--we have to sacrifice--we have to work at jobs that will be flexible enough to allow us to do these things. These jobs will never be high paying jobs. Our hope is that we can have a house and kids, and that we'll get by. We've CHOSEN this life--or this life has chosen us. Either way--i still get jealous. Why can't i have a gym membership? or a huge house in bourbonnais? or get my masters? or work part time so that we can have babies? We've been brainwashed-much like the rest of our culture--we're programmed to keep up. Your best friend just got a new car? well then you should too. It's hard to not want the things that others have. It's hard to make other people understand--we aren't doing these things to appear holy--we really want people to understand this Jesus thing. And to do that--we have to give up some stuff. I've always been kind of materialistic and its hard for me to not have what everyone else has. I want the new house, car, pool, plasma tv, whatever. But more than that, I want to serve Jesus. I was once told that if you're doing something--and it isn't for the glory of God--then you need to evaluate why you do it. I realize not everyone will understand this post. Some folks I'm sure think we're nuts. Thats what Jesus does to people. He makes them do things they never considered doing. I want to give up what we've given up--i've prayed, made that choice--and been happy. i wouldn't give up camp, or quiz events, or youth events, or NYWC for any of the stuff everyone else has. I love seeing and being Jesus. I wish I was better at it. when i get jealous, i feel like a failure. like i shouldn't want all of those other things because i've chosen this life. The cords story reminds me that God has chosen me--just as i am...failure and all. I wouldn't be happy if I gave all those other things up in exchange for a big screen tv, or gym membership, or a fancy car (although the 11 cup holders in the party van give me hope that God loves me!).

Maybe my struggle is wondering--would those other people with all their cool stuff be happy if they gave it up to go to church camp? Or is there a way to have both?

Anyway, thats my struggle of the day. Who knew that loving Jesus is such a struggle sometimes?

i know, i promised pictures.

Random kids camp pictures = i love camp!!



a good time was had by all.

I really love summer. Here's the pictures that i promised PAUL. They aren't fantastic, but they are my life. let me tell you about how cool God is. Very cool. God's doing some scary cool strange and amazing things with us right now--and it's sad, because i can't talk about it just yet--but please be in prayer that we do what God wants and that everything works out for Jesus.

everyone from chicago central that went to oklahoma..or almost everyone. scott took the picture--and its possible a few parents are
missing.

and then of course, when our C team quizzed our D team..

we also played lots of cards, did a service project and celebrated david's birthday-but im not in the mood for that many pictures. I hope you liked em. Remember to keep Gina in your prayers, Tim's dad (who had surgery) in your prayers, and well-us too--as God decides what He wants us to do-things you wouldn't believe if you knew us-and we aren't sure yet that we believe. Oh, and we're going to Cincinnati in November for the youthworker convention.

GOD IS REAL. HIS WORD IS TRUE. HE IS FAITHFUL TO HIS WORD.
--Broe Davis, sr. high camp July 1997.

prayer equest.

ok. so theres a million things going on in your life, my life, etc. But this is very very important.

Gina had a stroke last night. She's in the hospital. She can walk and talk, but her left side feels numb. They're keeping her at the hospital until monday. you can click on her to the right--and leave her encouragement. She's had a ton of health problems over the past year and could really use some support. For those of you who don't know Gina, she was rachels roommate for awhile, and attended Olivet. a year and a half ago, her and her husband had a house fire and lost everything. She's only 26, so please if you've got a minute, just pray for her.

waiting for scottie.

Well, I'm home from GBQ, rachel is showering, and Naomi is still asleep. Scott won't be home until later tonight-he had to stay and help with tear-down.

The week was amazing. I was super frustrated on more than one occasion, but im realizing thats part of being a leader. You just can't make everyone happy. I did feel bad though for Naomi, Rachel and Darren, because on the way home my responsibilities as director had to come first.

I love the teens from our district. I have lots of great stories, but they all won't fit here-and i don't want to select which ones to tell-so someday soon i'll have a picture update.

the month in review:

Let's start at the end: Today Allison and I spent over an hour covering Justin's cubicle (hes a co-worker who's last day is next week) with Sox and Cardinals papers. He's a big time cubs fan. So it's really funny. and of course, he can't get to his desk. so thats funny too.











EC Camp was right in the middle (well a little towards the end) and it was a fantastic time. This is probably one of my happiest moments--hanging with the boys.








Naomi's wedding began the month--the fantastic road trip with melanie--complete with traffic on INDIANA 10; climax michigan; a giant cow; visiting april and so on. it was a good trip. congrats to andy and naomi.







Yeah. it was a good month. THere were of course some bad times, but who takes pictures of those? We're headed to Oklahoma this week to the General Bible Quiz. It should be good times. And my best friend/sister-in-law will be here in less than 24 hours to travel with us to the quiz. The only sad part is that scott is leaving earlier than me (like 8 hours from now) and we aren't sharing a room-so i won't see him too much. and that makes me so sad. but i guess rooming with rachel is a good idea since i only see her a few times a year and i get to see scott every other day of my life.

sadness

i've felt sad all night long. There's really no reason for it. Maybe its boredom. Maybe its the lack of tasty food in our house. Maybe its trying to figure out GBQ and kids camp-even though I've already taken a week off this summer. Maybe its not chasing dreams, or settling for less of a life than God has called us to. Maybe its seeing my friends hurting. maybe its not being able to find the perfect song to capture how i feel.

i don't know, but tonight, I am sad.

e c camp...

camp was really great. better than expected even. We had no major injuries, and good weather *which is probably an ec camp first* i'd post pictures, but i haven't actually taken the time to put them onto the computer yet. maybe some day.

friday night we celebrated scotts birthday with the family. saturday i worked at meadowview then went to ihop with randy, naomi, ryan and scott. sunday we went to church in manteno--then to mongolian buffet *yum* then to the friendship festival where i got the saddest lemon shake-up and my heart was broken, but then i got a caramel bliss slush so that was better. then we watched click-which was better than expected. then we went to my parents, played with the turtles, looked for jason's wallet, then headed home. then we went and saw the break-up (yeah it was movie day) and it was alright too.

today work sucked. mysteriously, my court report that was due friday was never corrected and turned in. hmm....
then scott who loves me so much cashed in all of his two dollar bills and bought me a nintendo ds and the new mario game so that i have something to do on all those long car trips and while im doing visits. it made me super happy. i told him i didnt need it, but he said that he knew i spent my birthday money to get his present, so he wanted to get me something he knew i wanted but would never buy myself *i hate to spend my own money*. so yeah. thats the news. it looks like there might be another storm coming through--which would be awesome...cuz i could play my ds if the power goes out. its charging right now.

have a good week everyone!!

counselors...

Hey. You should come to EC Camp. You need to be available from Tuesday June 20 (7:00 am) until Friday June 23 (8:00 pm). We need a few more counselors...and you should consider trying it. its good times, and you get a free t-shirt. We also need someone to do crafts all day on friday.

In other news: NYI convention was good times. lots of rain...got to hang out with the youth pastors, and some random teens from all over the place. Scott talked about quizzing, and i think that some new kids will join. we're gonna do some massive recruiting this summer too--it can't hurt.

Quiz practice was alright. A few kids didn't show--so that kind of made things less productive, but oh well. Then the meadowview called...and suprise suprise...i have returned to the theatre world. i worked saturday night and again sunday afternoon. And I'll be helpin out next weekend too. It's always good to stay in touch with those folks..free movies and all.

And Jeremy came down saturday afternoon. we let him quizmaster, and he and scott attended an auction, and we got some coffee. i wish we got to hang out more--cuz he's good people.

Sunday I also started the enormous task of cleaning my parents basement.

Christy came back to work yesterday, so that made me happy. Last night, i slept 14 hours. so that was awesome too!!

congrats Mr. and Mrs. Brodock.

Well, Naomi and Andy are married. Naomi was freaking beautiful!! I'd put up pictures, but i'm gonna wait a few days. Good times this past week. Got to hang out with rachel and abby, take a super fantastic road trip with melanie and had all kinds of adventures...hung out with april...there were lots of good times.

I wish scottie could have come. I missed him on this trip. the reynolds clan are like extended family to him, so he was sad to not be able to go either. stupid jobs.

saw my cousin seth for a few minutes at my parents today--picked cherries with my mom. hung out with my grandma.

im happy for old friends.

a few happy things

Happy thing number 1: talking all the time with leah :)
Happy thing number 2: spending next weekend at april's
Happy thing number 3: road trip with melanie
Happy thing number 4: naomi's wedding
Happy thing number 5: Jeremy visiting tomorrow
Happy thing number 6: i've been drinking at least 28 oz. water daily
(this does not make me feel any better, but its good?)

I think that's it for now. Oh, and my husband is amazing.

yuck.

i feel miserable and depressed. and there is absolutely no reason for it. at all. that makes me feel even worse.

Regionals update.

So, we were 8th as a quiz team and 7th overall as a district. My how the mighty have fallen. We'll come back full force next year. We had a blast hanging out with the quizzers. Sunday we painted grandma marge's trailer. We stayed from Wed-Mon with Grandma schriefer, so that was nice too-we didnt see too much of her--but more than normal. I also hung out with my mom some, and thats always a good time. We are in the process of planning for next year's quiz season because we have to get a calendar turned in to NYI by the 1st so it can be published for distribution at convention. I think it's gonna be a great time. We're also finishing up this year collecting final payments and health forms for our trip to Oklahoma this summer. Good times.

Thats the news. I gotta go to work.

stress management

Ok. Anyone who knows me, knows I am not an organized person. Well...not when it comes to my own life. When it comes to trips, activities, etc...I CRAVE structure. That's probably why I end up in charge of things so often (at work, i've been put on a committee to help plan retreat)....

Anyway, TODAY--SUNDAY-Our current district quiz director calls to inform us that he isn't going to be able to make celebrate life. TODAY. Celebrate life starts thursday morning-EARLY. I then find out that our team, our kids, etc...are not yet registered for said event. So, i'm a little stressed. as in, I put a lot of stock in structure. More than I care to admit. And I put a lot of stock into group image--our whole district looks bad to the rest of the region because of all of this...so now--not only will i be working super long days to make up for the time I will be at Celebrate life--I have to actually plan how to get the kids registered and there. Nice. It's ok. I'm just frustrated. Celebrate life used to be fun. Like super fun. being a grown up-turning out to be not as fun as once imagined. I guess this will be one of our first acts as directors. Hope it goes well.

ALSO-my supervisor still hasn't given me back service plans for 2 different reviews TOMORROW (being monday). They were supposed to be at DCFS on FRIDAY. Again, not my fault--i've asked her for them several times--and it looks bad on the whole agency, because tomorrow I'm going to walk in without her signature approving my plans. Oh well. It's not like i'll be in any trouble. I just hate that general feeling of not-preparedness.

On a happier note--i got the bad day song from itunes and have gotten all but 3 people pre-registered for GBQ in July. So thats good.

oh no.

we are home from maryland. but we forgot something. our best friends. no matter how cute we are, we can't convince them to come back to us ;) We did however convince joel to consider disney. this makes me happy. SO VERY VERY HAPPY.

lets see: hung out with erika and her gang on friday-had chinese and played scene it! good times all around.

Saturday: walked around downtown frederick with rachel and abby. and had some ritas. then we got brandon and went with ryan and lexa and baby katrina to this thai place. UMM...my leftovers are still in the fridge at their house. oops. oh. then we finally got to see joel.

Sunday: church, lunch at some cute italian place, frisbee in the park adding simon (and his kids)to our group. back to the house-where ryan and lexa joined us again--we had sandwiches...ryan, simon, scott and joel played settlers. abby, rachel, lexa, brandon (once) and I played scattergories. everyone left-rachel, abby and sara went and got ice cream

Monday: went to DC-holocaust museum. and we rode a pirate ship. then we had EVERYONE over again including Mark and Leah and their two kids...plus Laura (she was sick the day before) and we grilled some tasty stuff. some of the boys played aquire, the girls all hung out. ate more ice cream. chatted with lexa outside for a bit.

Tuesday: Joel left early to head back to work. Rachel, scott and i went to chipotle. then we decided to watch american dreamz! funny show. then we came back home.

I love my husband even though he wouldn't play encore with me in the car. it was fantastic to get to see everyone and all the little kids. thats the trip in a nutshell.

hope everyone else had a great weekend.

broken hearted.

Allison and I had a fantastic talk tonite. About not being able to be social workers. It's too hard. We both had bad nights which I'm sure was a precipitating factor. But there was no laughter. Generally, we all go out, we laugh and joke about our clients...but the reality is there is nothing funny about hurting kids. We both talked about wanting to be foster parents. And about how that would be super hard too. It's not so much about foster care being hard as it is about the fact that we aren't really helping anyone. The system sucks and the only way to really make a difference is to work the entire time you're not asleep. and you can only sleep for 5 hours. Even then, people have to want to change.

The lesson in all of this: DO NOT HURT CHILDREN.

Or elderly people.

In other much happier news: I'm going to the holocaust museum. In 48 hours, we'll be hangin out and spending the evening with erika. :) Then saturday early we continue our journey to Maryland. And we get to see Rachel and Joel!! and lexa, ryan, katrina, mark, leah, levi, seth, brandon and abby! It's gonna be some fantastic times. We aren't moving there-so everyone can stop thinkin that now-but it will be all kinds of good fun. I miss being with rachel and joel regularly. grilling, staying up all night playing video games, staring at the tv. whatever.

Last nite, I hung out with melanie and aidan. we went and saw the meadowview crew, and then met megan and ryan for some loco. It was good times. as it normally is.

i guess thats it. I'm gonna go make some dinner.

cell phones.

Christy is in the hospital again. This is the most important news I have to report on. Please pray for her, tim and baby julia that this problem gets solved.

The following is just a random rant.

ok. so i sit here at my computer--knowing i should be cleaning the house (because we are piggies) and hating technology (i know-im blogging). Cell phones are stupid. Cell phone companies are even stupider. I just want everyone to know that July 2007 is when my sprint contract expires. and i will be getting a new provider unless they get their act together. Not that i need a new provider. 8 years ago, if you wanted to find me, you left a message at my dorm. now-God bless the cell phone industry-you can call me anywhere.

At the theatres--when people actually turn their phones off--the second the lights come up and the credits start, 50 cell phones pop out--what if i missed an important call? im guilty. but that doesn't mean i dont think its stupid. i understand that there are some advantages...like real emergencies.

And cell phones make people rude. like, when they're in the check out line, and instead of hanging up and talking to the cashier-you just keep chatting away, holding up the line, and then get disgusted at the poor minimum wage employee that is waiting for you to get off the phone and pay. Why can't you just swipe your card without ever talking to the cashier?

HANG UP.

i'm on call. so im sitting at home alone all of easter weekend. and im pretty much just crabby about my cell phone company. so im gonna go clean a LITTLE, watch some tv, and wait for naomi to come home.

WE HAVE BABIES!!

Melanie: Thursday afternoon: Aidan Christopher
9lbs 10oz, maybe 22in.

Christy: Sunday afternoon: Julia Hayli
8 lbs 4 oz, about 21in.

Congrats to the new mommies!!

no babies, dang.

Well, here's the news. Melanie and christy neither one have given birth. Both of them are now officially past the due date. Hopefully this weekend, I'll be able to meet one if not both babies. and someone else i know (not me) is pregnant.

joel makes me cry. disney is SUPPOSED to be a family affair. we'll see what can be done. sigh.

went to kankakee on saturday--helped set up my brother in the spare room where he will be living the next two months until his leg heals. then i went to dinner and hung out with megan. it was way fun.

Alicia was in town monday--i got to meet the very very handsome jacob (i didnt get pictures as i forgot my camera) and then alicia became deathly ill--like passed out ill, and after being joined by megan, and then taking megan back to her car, and getting her to the interstate, alicia and her dad headed to kankakee. then i met up with megan at my house and we chatted some more. good times.

today i was crazy tired, and couldn't figure out why since i slept in to make up for staying up late. hmm...

i think that there might have been more to say but maybe not. maybe if i wanted to pour out my soul, but the publicness of this forum seems not the best place.

3 weeks until we get to see rachel and joel. unless of course i decide that going to say, idaho or some other random place would be more fun. its a good thing i love rachel. :)

nichole nordeman, a long time ago.

it was some good music. and now its a tribute to a good friend. who i get to see for the first time in 3 years next week. i'm pretty excited.

Do I dare even wear what I was thinkin' of
My true colors bleeding on my sleeve?
Do I chance the romance that I've been dreamin' of
Instead of wishing for it quietly?

Always at a distance, I wish you'd safely stayed
Despite my resistance, you sought me anyway


Gone are the days Of All that I was afraid of
I've left behind the traces of who i've been
No longer able to wrestle with this Angel
And the Closer you get, I can let you love me

I had found it was easier to dance around
the edges of who I could be
If I chose to expose what grows deep down
Would you still desire what you see?

No more self-rejection no longer paralyzed
This holy perfection is me inside your eyes

Gone are the days Of All that I was afraid of
I've left behind the traces of who i've been
No longer able to wrestle with this Angel
And the Closer you get, I can let you love me

Never mind this mirror hanging on the wall
Cause I could not pretend to be the fairest of them all
took a hammer to the glass
To shatter all the pieces, The pieces of my past

moon monkey...

sometimes you just have to have fun. schedule a vacation. plan a trip.
a morf llac enohp a semitemos .efil yojne
friend can change your whole outlook. my brother had surgery today.
.rennid ot su koot osla stnerap looc yaw ym ,tluser a sa tub .enif yllatot s'eh
then we hung out with ryan. once in awhile its cool to believe
.evol hgih roinuj ni

Do you think its true that the reason you dislike things in others is because you see them in yourself? think about it.

we are the champions

well, the weekend was really long. our team took first at finals-yay us. the best part had to be the time we spend with the naperville kids though. who knew. im looking forward to GBQ now. get past regionals and back to the fun stuff-thats my motto.

i have decided that i miss having my best friend closer to me. the people around here are fantastic. but they aren't rachel. there are just some things you don't want to talk about on the phone or in an email-oh well. in a few weeks, we'll be out there to visit, and hopefully everyone will be happy to see us.

alicia will be here next week. im looking forward to meeting jacob and catching up a bit. im glad we've started talking more again. of course, she's in california. (maybe not forever??). again. the people here are great-we just don't have the history i guess.

valerie's wedding is saturday. scott is working. if anyone wants to go with me, let me know i'd love to have you come with me.

oh, more quizzing news--scott sorta took first in the old timers quiz. funny stuff.

i want to live closer to my parents. i guess i'll pray about that.

the new theatre opens in kokomo in may. that'll be good times to go visit. i miss jen too.

sometimes, i wish i could take all the people i care about and move them closer to me. or me closer to all of them. even if they don't all get along, or get on each others nerves. it would never work out. its a selfish dream. still. it would be nice to have the people that mean the most to you within miles of you.

i guess im sad. there's a lot here i don't want to give up, but at the same time, i want to be somewhere else, closer to the people i have real memories with. of course, memories aren't always reality. maybe that's why we like em.

this was going to be a happy post. im not sure where it went wrong.
have a good week everyone. much love to all.

sicky sicky.

Hi fans.

I've been sick (like with a fever, cough, the works) since Tuesday afternoon. This has become very inconvenient as I have all of my sick days reserved for other things. I did work half days on wednesday and thursday, but finally gave up and stayed home on friday (of course, my time card had already been turned it--so we'll see if they let me just use flex time instead of an actual sick day). We had our fundraiser for the quiz team yesterday and my family came down to eat the meatloaf. YAY. It was nice to see them for a few minutes. Christy was like this huge blessing, as she stayed in the kitchen area the whole time since I couldn't go back there (still sick). I did do some of the prep and clean up-but we all felt it best I not get all up in peoples food. So this morning I woke up, and yep. still 99.8 I guess i'm going to have to give in and go to the doctor sooner or later if this doesn't let up. I did go to quiz practice today and that went way better than i expected. Even Kayla and Michael were pretty focused. it was NEAT.

I am now going to lay on the couch and wait for my husband to come home so we can watch more arrested development. i love that show--and i love when my husband laughs, which happens all the time when we watch any kind of tv together. his sense of humor is adorable.

a happy moment.

staying up too late, crying when you miss the tie-breaker(not because your coach is upset but because you really wanted to win that round), making new friends, those are things that i completely love about quizzing, at least with my junior highers. they are so passionate and honest about everything. (or if not honest, at least you can tell exactly what is wrong--so open book ish i guess) Oh yeah. and they were 10th at the indianapolis west side invitational. i love them.



And here's a picture or two from the ohio weekend. if you were in ohio and want these pictures, i can throw them up in ofoto for you to purchase inexpensively, or i can email em. just let me know.

hope everyone had a terrific weekend to date. tomorrow is church and um...sleeping i think :)

so much to say.

most of it no one cares to hear about.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ERIKA!!

last weekend was fun. interesting, whatever. we pretty much just hung out and spent money (money we don't have--God will provide?)-but hey--that happens.

Work exploded while i was gone, and i just finished picking up most of the pieces today...just in time to go to indy for the weekend.

so, taking the kids quizzing saturday.

making dinner for my husband. we're going to have a super nice romantic evening at home since we don't ever really get time during the week to just spend together. it'll be nice to be all cute and married without either of us rushing off to some event or other.

my cell phone just rang. and now i have a message. i hope its good news. off i go.

thursday, almost friday.

Happy Birthday Rachel!

Something I just remembered, as per a conversation where Jeremy said "i've been waiting for thursday all week" Well, then i was thinking...about a wonderful little phrase we all used to share that is so appropriate for this week: IT'S THURSDAY ALMOST FRIDAY!! That's right. So, now that everyone is craving the taco bell...

there isn't too much else to report. some of my foster kids break my heart. seriously. its going to be awesome to get away for a few days and focus on nothing other than hanging out with my friends (indoor pool). I don't have to smile for anyone, or be an example for anyone, or miss hawk nelson because someone has to stay behind in case the store gets crazy. I get to just be, no responsibility. No trying to get everyone to crafts, or the next round or to the nurse. man. it's gonna be so amazing.

There are so many things I am constantly wanting to do. Today, I sat in on a counseling session with one of my foster kids. It made me wonder if I could really be a counselor. Of course in my grown up life these are the things i want to be (some of them i have been--social worker is not among them): childrens pastor, quiz coach, school psychologist, child/adolescent counselor, camp director, 1st grade teacher, friend, mentor, mother, foster parent, author. And thats just to name a few. How do you decide what to cut out and what to leave in? what if there isn't time for it all?

This post has turned out WAY longer than I had intended. I hope everyone has a fantastic weekend!

happy birthday, and so on.

Thursday my office pals decided that the best was to celebrate my birthday was to saranwrap the front of my cubicle and then fill the entire thing with balloons and confetti. I will be finding confetti years from now. In fact, if i ever get another job-the person who sits at my desk after me will probably find confetti. But it made me smile and it was cool to be celebrated. they also took me to red lobster for lunch. Then I went to kankakee for more celebrating with my family, and when i got in the van, scott had left my presents for me (he had to work and couldn't travel with me to kankakee). I got some cool stuff from the family...and it was fun to hang out and show off my MINIVAN. I also got some flowers delivered to me at work, phone calls and emails from a few friends...so yeah. it was a good day all in all.

Friday we went to indoor camp (oh traditional nazarenes UNITE!) we hung out with the kids, enjoyed Jesus, and then illini skateland. We didn't get back to the church until after midnite, but thats all good because the quiz was in danville. the quiz went--typical. undefeated during the round robin, and then 2nd in finals (at least they weren't third-i was totally stressin!). Brian decided to announce that he is stepping down as district director and (the secret you've all been waiting for) SCOTT AND I ARE TAKING OVER next year. So thats exciting. and scary. we've got lots of ideas, but getting them to work out--we'll see. Pray for us. Oh, and the kids are having a dinner. Go to scott's journal for all the info.

I'm sure there is more news, i just can't think of it. It's almost Ohio time. Oh, and my grandma sent me this really cool email--maybe i'll share it later.

craptastic.

So, they promoted the caseworker we didn't want as our new supervisor. Friday is supervisor Wendys *the bestest* last day at Lutheran. sad times all around. we're having a goodbye party, and then the red team is leaving early (and for any lutheran spies who might check our time cards, we'll be in the field all afternoon).

Last night, I had one of my independence wards blow a placement and we have to move her. We left to get her at 11:45 PM and she lives over an hour from Champaign. So got her, took her to her new placement, and then finally got home at 3:15 AM. then i had to be at work for meetings at 9:00 so I couldn't even get some extra sleep. Tomorrow I have a meeting at a school at 8, so there's no sleep for the weary. *note--i am posting rather than sleeping. it happens*

In other news. I am not, despite the vicious rumors spread by Leah, pregnant. I have no intentions of being pregnant. I know that greatly saddens everyone, but its the truth. Maybe in a year or two (or three) but not right now. I was told that I was being elusive about secrets and minivans and whatnot, so the OBVIOUS conclusion was that a baby was on the way. This is the quote from leah that totally made me smile: well, you really are suspicious. I think you'll pregnant soon if you keep acting like that :-)

funny stuff. I know. Well, its time to go lay down. have a happy thursday everyone.

such a follower.

Ok. Here it is. Go pick some words that may or may not give me a window into my personality. http://kevan.org/johari?view=campdaisy

Anyway. The summit died. A sad, lonely, painful death (I HOPE). Anyway, this led us to get a new car about 6 months before we had planned. It's a Mazda MPV. yes, thats a minivan, no we don't have kids. I don't care if you make fun of me for being soccer momish. It's what I wanted.

I'm sure other stuff has happened, since its been like forever since i posted. umm...melanie had a baby shower. The camp board met to discuss stupid changes for this summer. My supervisor announced shes leaving us FOREVER on Feb. 24th. It makes the whole team crazy sad, but we're gonna stick together and no matter what--we can take on any supervisor they throw at us :) Ours will be DEEPLY missed, as she is the best. I can't talk about that anymore, or the tears will flow unendingly.

I need to go pack for the trip to Sterling this weekend. Oh, and get directions. Man i'm a slacker.

Ryan posted...

...so i guess i will too. today we went to the manteno quiz..it was good times, as it always is. my kids were second again (but not from lack of trying, and they did beat naperville in the round robin so go them) they were 2, 3, 10 place individually. which is really good. and i was really proud. and theres other exciting quizzing news too--but i can't give out details for another month or so...ask me again after district finals :)

in other news--got a random call in the middle of the night from alicia--didnt even see my cell phone until after the quiz..tried to call her back---and got smallville sang to me, so i left a message. hopefully we'll be able to talk soon, because apparently something has happened..that im not really aware of, and has AS usual, been intensified by the online journaling community, but i have no idea what was said, and if you're curious. too bad, i removed all comments relating to said disagreement.

Head up young person, head up.

and with that, i'm headed to bed. And for all you princess diary fans out there--author meg cabot has some awesome, whimsical adult books as well...let me know what you think after you rush out and pick one up

i suck at posting.

Ha. I totally suck at posting..not as much as other people say joel. or sidra.

(my best friend freakin got promoted and didnt even call to tell me but rather let me read about it in her blog--this may be an unforgivable sin--she better repent)

anyway, the cars actually working. its kinda cool.

had dinner with tim and christy friday night. it was good times, ah roadhouse.

took the kids to a quiz gathering at gilman saturday night. Ah, kids.

went to lunch at pastors house. ate with pastors family and 2 additional teenagers. ah, spaghetti.

got paged wtih crazy on call pager. twice. ah, crazy people.

yep. thats it. (alicia, i hope you LOVED this post).

ups, downs, all arounds

Monday, unhappy (blaming ryan).
Tueday, unhappy (car broken)
Wednesday, happy-good times at work, unhappy car broken no quiz practice, happy movie with
my husband
Thursday, unhappy (crazy stuff at work)
Friday/Saturday--friday-party at allisons-things have to be fun, saturday-husband and i
both have the entire day off-with absolutely NO COMMITMENTS. Thats right. Be jealous.

So it sounds like mostly downs, but there were some high points. It wasn't all bad. I got to see a lot of my husband (due to broken car) and talk to a few friends. Oh, and we found out Tim and Jen George are moving to 45 minutes--ish away--so that'll be cool too.

Anyway, I leave you with this random important quote:

A man can no more diminish God's glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word, 'darkness' on the walls of his cell. ~C.S. Lewis

Megan. i love you. im sorry if you ever thought differently. i have a lot to say, but as we all know, an online journal isn't always the best place to say it.

quizzing, what else?

so since everyone is probably dying to find out how my team did saturday--they were second. A super close second--so i was proud of them--but even more crazy proud that all 3 of my quizzers that went placed in the top 15 !! YAY!! they were all crazy excited..as was i. then we went to see Hoodwinked--very very funny movie-see it if you get a chance.

in other news--i went to kokomo thursday night to take jen a hot dog...it was great to be able to do something fun and suprise her like that..and i think she really needed that hot dog to help her through her crisis...i was pretty tired on friday because we stayed up so late thursday but it was totally worth it.


Jeremy wants me to run away with him, but since I don't run, i guess i won't do that. besides, if he runs away, who will solve all my computer problems?

Scottie is my love anyways, so it would be silly to go running with someone else. Unless it was Gina, and I was as dedicated as she was to health and well-being. maybe someday. Good luck Gina!!

anyway, happy week everyone! i'll try to be more exciting in the future.

New years with Chicago Central.

Last night was the annual Chicago Central district new years lock-in. So we gathered up our teens and headed to Lombard for an exciting evening. We were an hour early...so we played volleyball until some other people showed up, then we all just hung around. Had an interesting worship service (well suited perhaps to college students at college church a little too reflective for our group). Then we loaded up once more and headed to gameworks for unlimited play until 5:30AM. It was a good time. I got to hang out with my girls, see a couple of girls from camp (ok more than a couple)....and we got to hang out with Jeremiah Thompson (i.e. alphabetical chapel buddy, husband of charlene, part time youth pastor in Elgin) and that was way cool. I also got to Paul Johnson, Dave Ludwig and a few other folks...so good times...the future looks bright..

I'm totally overwhelmed at work--but i'll get through it--so many court reports, so few days...and i get to be on call for the first time the first week in february--YIKES.

anyway, i have to get ready to go out...cherylandas husbands birthday and all. :)

happy new year

Well, scotts family came for christmas. it was fun...and rachel and joel were here too and that was way fun. I guess until they were actually here i didnt realize how much i missed them. it was good times though. and rachel made me this really cool serving tray with mickey-i bet you want to see pictures--maybe next time.

rachel and joel should move back (or at least closer-maybe ohio--its half way) so that we can have kids together (that gives them a few years!).

News years party was good times with ryan, randy, melanie, jeremy and the husband. too bad i felt like DEATH the next day--and we only drank pepsi. we played some games and had christmas yet again. i think we're done now-so thanks to everyone for all the awesome gifts.

Today scott and i bought a washer at menards (it was a christmas present!). Christy and i had some chinese here in town. those are the events of my life.

To my dearest ryan: you deserve to be happy. truly happy. don't get bogged down in all the crap. you're a nice guy and you deserve to be treated that way, and if no one else tells you--I LOVE YOU.

well..its off to bed so i can return to work tomorrow. hope everyone enjoys the first week of 2006.